THE MORAL OF THE STORY:

IF YOU ARE UNHAPPY

Once upon a time, there was a non-conforming sparrow that decided not to fly south for the winter.

However, soon the weather turned so cold that he reluctantly started to fly south. In a short time, ice began to form on his wings and he fell to earth in a farmyard, almost frozen.    A cow passed by and crapped on the little sparrow.   The sparrow thought it was the end, but the manure warmed him and defrosted his wings. Warm and happy, able to breathe, he started to sing.   Just then a large cat came by, and hearing the chirping, investigated the sounds.

The cat cleared away the manure, found the chirping bird, and promptly ate him!

The moral of the story:

1. Everyone who shits on you is not necessarily your enemy.

2. Everyone who gets you out of the shit is not necessarily your friend.

3. And, if you're warm and happy in a pile of shit, keep your mouth shut!

THE STORY OF THE BULL AND THE PEASANT !!!!

A pheasant was standing in a field chatting with a bull.  

"I would love to be able to get to the top of yonder tree',  sighed the pheasant, 'but I haven't got the energy'. 

 'Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?' replied the  bull. 'They're packed with nutrients'.  

The pheasant pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. And so on. Finally, after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Whereupon he was spotted by a farmer who dashed into the farmhouse, emerged with a shotgun, and shot the pheasant right out of the tree. 

Moral of the story:

Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.

A FARMER AND HIS DONKEY:

ONE DAY A FARMER'S DONKEY FELL DOWN INTO A WELL.

THE ANIMAL CRIED PITEOUSLY FOR HOURS AS

THE FARMER TRIED TO FIGURE OUT WHAT TO DO.

FINALLY, HE DECIDED THE ANIMAL WAS OLD, AND THE

WELL NEEDED TO BE COVERED UP ANYWAY;

IT JUST WASN'T WORTH IT TO RETRIEVE THE DONKEY.

HE INVITED ALL HIS NEIGHBORS TO COME OVER AND

HELP HIM. THEY ALL GRABBED A SHOVEL AND BEGAN

TO SHOVEL DIRT INTO THE WELL. AT FIRST, THE

DONKEY REALIZED WHAT WAS HAPPENING AND CRIED

HORRIBLY. THEN, TO EVERYONE'S AMAZEMENT HE

QUIETED DOWN.

A FEW SHOVEL LOADS LATER, THE FARMER FINALLY

 LOOKED DOWN THE WELL. HE WAS ASTONISHED AT WHAT

HE SAW. WITH EACH SHOVEL OF DIRT THAT HIT HIS

BACK, THE DONKEY WAS DOING SOMETHING AMAZING.

HE WOULD SHAKE IT OFF AND TAKE A STEP UP.

AS THE FARMER'S NEIGHBORS CONTINUED TO SHOVEL

 DIRT ON TOP OF THE ANIMAL, HE WOULD SHAKE IT

OFF AND TAKE A STEP UP.

PRETTY SOON, EVERYONE WAS AMAZED AS THE DONKEY

STEPPED UP OVER THE EDGE OF THE WELL AND

 HAPPILY TROTTED OFF!

 ***********************************

LIFE IS GOING TO SHOVEL DIRT ON YOU, ALL KINDS

OF DIRT. THE TRICK TO GETTING OUT OF THE WELL

IS TO SHAKE IT OFF AND TAKE A STEP UP. EACH OF

 OUR TROUBLES IS A STEPPINGSTONE. WE CAN GET OUT

 OF THE DEEPEST WELLS JUST BY NOT STOPPING,

 NEVER GIVING UP! SHAKE IT OFF AND TAKE A STEP UP.

REMEMBER THE FIVE SIMPLE RULES TO BE HAPPY:

 FREE YOUR HEART FROM HATRED - FORGIVE.

FREE YOUR MIND FROM WORRIES - MOST NEVER HAPPEN.

LIVE SIMPLY AND APPRECIATE WHAT YOU HAVE.

 GIVE MORE.

EXPECT LESS 

 NOW........

 ENOUGH OF THAT CRAP. THE DONKEY LATER CAME BACK,

 AND BIT THE FARMER WHO HAD TRIED TO BURY HIM.

 THE GASH FROM THE BITE GOT INFECTED AND

THE FARMER EVENTUALLY DIED IN AGONY FROM SEPTIC SHOCK.

MORAL FROM TODAY'S LESSON:

 WHEN YOU DO SOMETHING WRONG, AND TRY TO COVER

YOUR ASS, IT ALWAYS COMES BACK TO BITE YOU.