The End Is Where We Start.

“What we call the beginning is often the end. And to make an end is to make a beginning. The end is where we start from” T.S. Eliot

Endings and Beginnings

I have been thinking about life's endings and beginnings, large and small, that create opportunities for us to align who we are with what we do.

We experience endings and beginnings every day, such as day turning into night; the changing seasons; and our creation and discarding of new ideas. Much has been said in the past about the cyclical nature of life.

Our endings may be small or large, from physical location change to the death of the loved ones. There are all kinds of ending:  happy endings, such as waving goodbye to the couple leaving for their honeymoon; bittersweet endings, such as a child leaving his or her childhood home; and exhilarating endings, such as college graduation.

Of course with all endings comes the possibility of new beginnings: of new places, new careers, new ideas and new or enriched relationships. The duration between endings and new beginnings can be a matter of minutes or it could be years. This time, between ending and a new beginning can be a taxing one; it certainly is a time of uncertainty. It is a time of transition.

Ending are not always planned, sometimes life just surprises us with it. Some of us have experienced major endings as destabilizing as they thrust us into unknown territory. We are shaken, taken by surprise, possibly fearful of what will happen next and initially unable to see options for moving forward.

Most of us have experienced ending one way or the other since childhood, yet, when a loss or ending occurs; it is not easy to see the silver lining – especially at that moment. Often, we need some time and distance to work through (understand) the ending before we can identify what we may have learned from the situation and move forward.

My experience is that when an ending and loss come into our lives, we are able to access resources of strength and courage that we did not even know that we had. We find resiliency and capabilities that surprise even ourselves. Often though, we don’t even recognize it until the period of loss has passed. It is amazing how we readjust our lives with clearer focus on what has meaning and value for us.  Many of us find balance, support, even joy in a very difficult time of our lives. We discover deeper sense of who we are and what each moment of life means to us and we shift our priorities as the situation of our lives changes. We concentrate in what is important to us.

Regardless of how our culture have a hard time dealing with endings and regardless of it’s expectation of us to move forward as soon as possible, regardless of us wanting to pretend outwardly and show the world that we have moved on (even though we are stuck inside,) we cannot move forward until we stop, take the time to mourn and to learn from the experience. The end is where we start.