Don't take your loved one for granted.

I used to say, I took my loved ones for granted, but, I found that statement to be untrue. I came to realize that it is not possible to take our loved ones for granted, because love makes us give more, not less.  So, what is it that makes us take people for granted? I think, it is when we are loved by a person and we are aware of it. When we know beyond reasonable doubt that this person loves us deeply and he/she would never leave/abandoned us.  We that belief in mind, we concluded by mistake, that we don't have to do anything to keep that person tied to us. Because we know, it is a done deal. It is when we are loved but we don't love that person the same way. That is when we start taking people for granted. While we are busy hurting & ignoring the people who love us, we go out of our way to impress and convert strangers to come to our camp, to come love us. 

 

Our parents, siblings, family and friends are the ones who love us and interact with us everyday.  There is no guarantee that they will always be there. By thinking that they will always be there, we can easily take their love for granted. The contribution that they make to our lives can sometimes go by unnoticed. We are so sure that they will always be there for our beck and call. Then one day, out of the blue, the phone doesn't ring, the letter stops coming, the email stops coming, no one is there to knock on our door...the person is gone. No amount of grief or regret will bring the person back. At that point, we begin to realize just how much we have lost. The space that is left in our lives, that was once full, is now empty. Regret starts creeping into our thoughts that maybe we did not say enough to the person, while they were still here. Even though it is impossible to change the past, it is not too late to change the present. The fact that we lost the one we love should be our wake up call, not to repeat the same mistake with the others. This is the time to let the people who mean a lot to us how much we love, cherish and appreciate them. This is the time to say "Thank You", "I am sorry", "Please forgive me" & " I have forgiven you."  

For some of us, it is hard to express our appreciation in words, often; we don't know what to say. Other times, we are just plain selfish, and we don't want to appreciate them because we feel entitlement, we say, we did not ask for it. Claim, our loved ones love us because they want to, we did not ask them for to love us, and so, why should we be grateful for them.  

If we stop and think about it, I don't think we want to collect more people to love us, it is because once we get love, we don't know what to do with it. We just want to add them to our own personal fan list, and then we are ready to move on to our next unsuspected victim. 

This is the place to start realizing the value of true and lasting love. The love that never expects anything in return, that seeks happiness in your smiles that breaks down on a sing tear in your eye... with no expectation.     

 

Every one in our lives is Godsend. No one comes into our lives by accident.  They might have stayed for a short or, longer period of time in our lives. They might have come into our lives to help us, to support us, to listen to us, to make us laugh, to

I have always believed that people come in to our lives because that God has put them there on purpose. Sometimes, we know the purpose and sometimes we don't, but that does not have any bearing on the result. They are put in our way for us to love them and to beloved by them.

Some of these people made a "little" difference, while others make a "huge" difference in my life. The first group walked into my life and left out of it fast. They left absolutely nothing to remember them by.  They rarely cross my mind, if ever. As if their presence in my life has never happened. The point is, whether we remember people who have been in our lives or not, they did have an impact in our lives and we have made impact in theirs. {Recently, I read a story about a Vietnam vet, he was a pilot. He run into someone in a restaurant and the other person come to him and ask him if he was "so and so" (I don't remember the name), the pilot said "yes, do I know you?" the man said "yes, I am the one who packed your parachute." The pilot had tears in his eyes and said "Thank you. It is because of you that I am still alive. You see, at the end, when my plain was hit, I used my parachute to escape."} 

The second group left their imprints in my heart. We love each other strongly, gladly, wisely: with our heart, with our arms, with our minds; with our affection, with our anger, with our truth, with the willingness to reveal ourselves to each other as humans.  The thought of them bring a smile to my face and joy to my heart. I wish they would never have to walk away, leave or die.  But, no matter what happened in the end, they will always be part of my heart.

Both groups of people are Godsend. They might have stayed for a short or long time in my life. They might have come into my life to help me, to support me, to listen to me, to make me laugh, to introduce me to something new or to help me recognize the old,  or maybe they needed me in their life as well as I needed them in mine. As I get older and lose some of these people, what I am learning is that life is continuation of moments, so, I need to learn to live for the moment. Instead of worrying and planning for the future, I need to relax, unwind and enjoy the moment. This is also the moment that I should start expressing my appreciation and say thank you.

The truth is, I am not very good in expressing my appreciation for those people who mean a lot to me. I used to say that I took them for granted, but lately, I came to the realization that it is not possible to take the people I love for granted. Because love make us give more, not less.  So, what is it that makes us take people for granted? It is when we are loved by a person and we are aware of it. That knowledge makes us feel that we no longer have to do anything to keep that person tied to us.

It is when we are loved but we don't love that person the same way. That is when we start taking people for granted. While we are busy hurting the people who love us by taking them for granted, we will go out and try to convert strangers to come to love us. We just want to add them to our own personal fan list, and then we are ready again for the next hunt. 

Our parents, siblings, family and friends are the ones who love us and interact with us on everyday basis. There is no guarantee that they will always be there. By thinking that they will always be there, we can easily take their love for granted. The contribution that they make to our lives can sometimes go unnoticed by us. We are so sure that they will always be there for our peck and call. Then one day, out of the blue, the phone doesn't ring, the letter stops coming, the email stops coming, no one is there to knock at our door...the person is gone. No amount of grief or regret will bring the person back. At that point, we begin to realize just how much we have lost. The space that is left in our lives, that was once full, is now empty. Regret starts creeping into our thoughts that maybe we did not say enough to the person, while they were still here. Even though it is impossible to change the past, it is not too late to change the present.

This is the place to start realizing the value of true and lasting love. The loves that never expect anything in return, that seeks happiness in our smiles, which breaks down on a single tear in our eyes... Now it is our turn to give back everything that they have showering on us without our awareness. This is the time when we get the greatest blessing of God "the ability to love people without any expectation. To show unconditional love, just like the Lord loves us."   

I don't know what to morrow has in store for me, so, I want to say thank you for all the people who were and are in my life. I am sorry, if I have made you feel unloved and unappreciated. I do love and appreciate you. Thank you for being there for me. Thank you for loving me, for teaching me, and for being there for me.  Your presence in my life has made my life better, richer and deeper.

If you are like me and did not show or express your appreciation to your loved ones, I hope you would do so now, before it is too late. Show them that their presences were never taken for granted.