Forgiveness: Let us not spend our precious time by holding on to grudges.

Forgiveness does not mean we will forget the past or change what already happened, it means we change the memory of our past into our hope in the future.

What does forgiveness means?

Forgiving is the only way to be fair to ourselves after someone hurts us unfairly. Forgivers are not doormats; they do not have to tolerate the bad things that they forgive. Forgivers are not fools; they forgive to heal themselves, but they do not have to go back for more abuse. We don’t have to wait until the other person repents before we forgive him or her and heal ourselves. Forgiving is a journey.  For us, it takes time, so be patient and don’t get discouraged if you backslide and have to do it over again.

Many years ago, I have witnessed a woman on her death bed crying out hateful words and  she instructed her son not to let certain people to come to her funeral because she was holding  grudges against them. To say I was shocked would be the understatement of the century. I know I am naive when it comes to certain things but to me what she said was wrong. I don't know why she wasted the  precious time she had left on this earth to be negative. The kind of things I often hear people on death bed are 'Please forgive me, I forgive you, I love you, I thank you, etc.' 

I believe the reason is because #aWhealing start with forgiveness.   Over time, the anger we can feel turns in to a bitterness that squeezes any joy out of the human soul.   And at the same time, the shame we feel when we know it is us who need to be forgiven can grow in to a terrible guilt.  While both offering and receiving forgiveness are often very difficult, the truth is that without the gift of forgiveness we will never be free.  Bitterness and guilt are terrible prisons - whether we are on our death bed or no t.

However, when we are face to face with our #mortality, there is the realization that time is short. The decision is made to embrace life—with all its beauty and all of its mess.  It no longer makes sense to hold on to the grudges or guilt that at one time consumed us.   Forgiveness is the key to freedom…to life.

If we are lucky, when we are face to face with mortality I hope we would find freedom through #forgiveness and love.  Rather than being swallowed alive by #bitterness or #guilt, we would instead be able to be full of compassion and love. Forgiveness does not come easy—whether we are asking for it or giving it.   And yet,  in a world that is parched for compassion there is precious little room for anything but for the gift of love.

"To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you." L. Smede